Punished....

i am not sure what got into me today but i went way over the line with Mistress. i got mouthy several times and didnt heed Her "warning" look. The last time i got mouthy Mistress gave me a pardon because i was soo ill. i got a little to full of myself and forgot the rule of always being respectful to Her.

my punishment was a spanking....and not a pleasurable one but i know thats the point. She had me lay down on the bed...i knew not to move and She left a huge handprint on my ass...which is still stinging. She promised if i got out of line disrespectful again, my whole ass would be stinging. i am going to do my best to not test that limit again.

i live to submit to Her so i dont understand why i went so far in things. Mistress wasnt angry with me...She never punishes me when She is angry...but She is disappointed. i am going to start doing check-ins with myself to figure out where my attitude is coming from.

does anyone else get out of line and not know why???

tens unit???

Mistress got me up bright and early the other morning and told me to get dressed because we were going out for a walk and a light breakfast. all was going well until the bus was late and i started feeling grumpy from the lack of my usual couple cups of espresso strong coffee first thing in the morning. Mistress asked what was wrong and in my caffeine deprived haze-i got mouthy and told Her exactly what was wrong. She wasnt amuzed to say the least with my attitude. She asked me rhetorically why i had forgotten my place. i tried explaining to Her that She knows i am grumpy before my coffee. i was confused and asked Her why i was in trouble since She has overlooked it before. She explained to me She overlooks it when we are at home but i know the rule of always being respectful when we are out in public. i knew i was in the wrong and apologized. She informed me that i was going to be punished after She thought about it. i let it go and we went out to breakfast. we then went to the dollar store where Mistress picked out rope, plastic red & blue clothes clips. She was looking at the spatulas for awhile but commented to me that we had enough at home and She still wanted to work in the whip on me. i kept envisioning myself being bound, clipped and whipped for the better part of the day. needless to say i was not looking forward to going home.

we finally made it home and Mistress had the look in Her eye that let me know that the time to be punished was near. the phone rang and i heard our teen answer it-she then came and knocked on our door and let us know that her bff had arrived in town early and they were wondering if she could come over a day early to visit for a week. we said ok and Mistress told me that i was basically saved from what She had in mind due to us having company but that She would figure out another way to punish me that was more discreet. She let me know later that evening that before we took off the next morning-She was going to put enhancement gel all over my clit and pussy for me to wear while we were out. i did a mini-laugh until i saw the look in Her eye and i realized She was serious. i got a bit angry at Her for being soo devious and clever. it is very hard for me to keep a straight face and not make a sound when i am aroused. i didnt sleep that good from staying up and strategizing on how i could be oblivious to the gel and not let on to anyone that i was aroused. Mistress also let me know that this punishment did not absolve me from being bound, clipped and whipped. that would happen after our company was gone.

the next morning Mistress put the gel on and i felt it tingle. Mistress told me to get dressed and get ready to go. i was mentally trying to ignore the sensations until we were outside and the wind gusted through me. the second the wind hit my crotch-my clit went "schwing" and my legs started turning to rubber. Mistress asked me what was wrong with a smirk on Her face. i whispered to Her that i just needed a moment. She denied my request and told me to start walking. i did as i was told. i made it through out the morning and afternoon ok. Mistress cracked up when She saw that i was so aroused that i had a wet spot in my pants. Mistress received a package that was a tens unit. She informed me that She is going to try it out on my pussy at Her discretion. i am a bit nervous about it. She has experience with them but i dont. does anyone have experience with them?

crate time...punishment

i really goofed this morning. i woke up in a foul mood. i slept through the alarm and while making coffee i forgot to plug it in. i didnt realize it until i went to drink a cup before Mistress and i had to leave. when Mistress and i got to where W/we were going W/we found out W/we were really early...Mistress had remembered the time wrong. She was able to get in early anyways. i was still trying to wake up and Mistress came out and was raring to go. W/we started walking and i was diddle-dawdling, which is against the rules. Mistress told me to hurry and i answered i was-i just had the wrong tone in my voice. i looked at Mistress and She had that look in Her eye-i knew i had crossed the line. i tried explaining to Mistress that i was grumpy because i hadnt had any coffee. She said that the new rule is i am 100% responsible for everything that comes out of my mouth. She told me when W/we got home i was to immediately get into the crate naked.

when W/we got home, i took my clothes off and got into the crate. i had to sit with my legs crossed, my head down and my palms to my sides with the palms up. Mistress walked by the crate and locked it and told me not to make a sound. i was quiet for awhile. i then saw O/our dog chewing on herself and i said "stop it" before i realized i was saying it. Mistress came out and asked me "didnt i tell you to be quiet". i explained why i spoke to the dog. She said "i don't care, i told you not to make a sound and you will learn". She then got O/our heavy duty mister and sprayed me down with ice cold water. my nipples got really hard. to make it colder Mistress brought in a fan and put it on high on me. i stayed in position while feeling the freezing air on me. the fan was blowing my hair everywhere and a strand of it fell on my nipple. out of habit i went to pluck it off. my nipple was so sensitive that the feel of my fingertips made me "mmmmm". Mistress saw and heard and said "did i tell you that you could touch yourself?". i said no but i was getting a hair off of me and that my nipples were extra sensitive because i was soooo cold. Mistress said "you're cold,huh, well, i can fix that and you will learn not to touch yourself like that without my permission". She left the room for awhile and when She came back-i saw that She had the vibrating egg. now one thing about Mistress, She loves to take toys and "tim the tool man taylor them"~ Her mantra is "more power". She had taken off the original controls for the egg and had spliced it to a battery pack for more & bigger batteries. She handed me the egg and said "put it on your clit and dont you dare take it off until i tell you to". i took the egg and put it on my clit. She turned it on and i almost immediately came. it had soo much power that i felt the vibrations in my teeth. Mistress leaned against the wall and watched me. i felt myself getting ready to orgasm, i asked "may i cum Mistress". She said "not yet". i fought the urge to cum and felt like if i didnt cum that my head was going to pop off. i waited all that i could wait and asked again if i could cum. Mistress gave me permission to. i came and i came hard. my whole body tensed, shook and felt the rush of orgasm. i thought that i was done but when I looked up at Mistress She said "keep it on there". i kept the egg on my too sensitive clit. i moved it a bit to the other side but it hit a more sensitive spot. my eyes almost popped out from the feeling being soo intense. i felt myself on the edge of cumming again. i asked Mistress for permission and She said " cum if you want but you will not take it off of your clit until i say so, cum all you want". i came again but kept the egg on. i knew that if i disobeyed Mistress at this point, the punishment would be alot worse. with every orgasm-they became more intense. my legs were completely numb and i had to lay in the crate on my side. my fingers were numb from the vibrating so i placed my palm over the egg. i had to fold the egg into my pussy lips so it wouldnt slip out of my palm. when i did this-the egg vibrated my whole pussy, including my gspot area in my pussy. Mistress must have sensed it because She moved to get a better view of me. i started to cum while also having the sensation to pee which i knew meant only one thing-time to squirt. as i came i pushed from inside my pussy and i squirted all over my legs and the bottom of the crate. Mistress said "you're not done yet". Mistress loves it when i squirt and She loves watching me make myself cum. i moved around as much as i could so Mistress could see better. i pressed the egg with my palm harder into my pussy so it would vibrate even deeper in my gspot. it took only a few seconds for me to feel myself getting ready to squirt again. when i came i pushed again but instead of the orgasming starting to subside i felt one another one beginning. i was having multiple orgasms and with each one-i squirted more and more. i started to go into convulsive like shakes from sensory overload. i still had the frame of mind to keep the egg on my clit. Mistress asked "have you learned to watch your mouth?". i said "yes Mistress, please no more, i will watch my mouth". She said, "well i want to make sure you remember this so keep it on there". by this point the orgasms were starting to hurt. my clit was oversensitive and it didnt take much for me to cum. i kept the egg on my clit but my side was feeling cramped so i went to turn over, the egg hit another area of my clit and i grabbed a bar of the crate as i felt myself orgasming again. as i came my body tensed and i squirted some more. i told Mistress "no more please, please Mistress no more". She said "not done yet, keep it there". i rolled over on my other side and used my palm to move the egg to a less sensitive area~the area seemed to have more nerve endings then i remembered. i pressed the egg into it as Mistress watched. i felt myself starting to orgasm-it was a different kind of orgasm. as i came i felt an explosion from deep inside my pussy-i pushed and gushed a big pool onto the crate floor. i have squirted before but never gushed. Mistress said " have you learned your lesson". i said "yes,Mistress". She said "ok-next time you get mouthy you will be in here longer and the punishment will be worse".

She let me out and i asked permission to go and shower. She watched me shower and i could tell that She was really horny from watching me orgasm and squirt in the crate. the children are going to be home soon so i dont know what more She has planned. will keep ya posted.

back to "normal"

after a couple days of talking about what went wrong-Mistress and i are now chalking it up to experience and moving on with what W/we learned from it. it wasnt soo much the physical aspect of what was going on. something about Mistress punching my arm triggered terror in me-terror i havent felt since my early childhood. my early childhood was very abusive and a big part of why i want to get my degree to work with disturbed children. luckily for me i was rescued from that hell and got intensive therapy for all that i had experienced and witnessed.
anyhow...Mistress was very concerned about retraumatizing me and was scared to physically punish me or even cause me pain (which i love) during play. it took U/us talking over the weekend for Her to realize that i dont view Her as abusive at all nor would i ever view Her as that. W/we are now back to normal- "O/our normal". on sunday night She caught me reading without my glasses-an infraction-so i was restricted from the computer,my cell, the phone and watching what i wanted on the tv all day monday.i also had to wear Mistress's leather jacket while W/we ran errands-the scent of leather makes me very horny and wet. Mistress forbid me to have toy time and She went everywhere with me to make sure i wasnt touching myself erotically.
i caught up on my reading after failing to be entertained by the sci-fi movie that Mistress was watching. i was going through computer withdrawals and was on edge from being so horny without release. Mistress made it worse by teasing my nipples and clit and then stopping right at the point i was going to orgasm several times.the last time i thought She was going to let me cum but right when i was going to ask permission to cum~She stopped and smiled Her wicked grin at me. i made a frustrated grunt and Mistress corrected my attitude by then inflicting massive pain on my breasts,nipples and ass.
i have added some things to the sidebar of my blog. the dragon represents Mistress and the fairy represents me. i have also added a daily fractal. i love fractals and cant help but staring at them. i am going through all of the gadgets and seeing which ones look interesting to add. my blog is a due process and always under construction.

which is worse......

the waiting for the punishment or the punishment itself? Mistress had me off the internet last night and i was exiled to a small corner of the bed to sleep on which wasnt very comfortable. today i was required to do all the household duties i hate the most on my hands and knees. i thought that was the end of my punishment but Mistress began whipping me with a leash and pinching my breasts and nipples really hard. i am not permitted to utter a sound during punishments but i was yelping in pain inside my head. with every lash i felt like my back and ass were on fire. when She squeezed my breasts i thought they were going to fall off. my nipples went numb from all the pain she inflicted on them. Mistress was interrupted by company knocking on the door. it is hot today but She told me to wear a shirt and pants to cover the marks She inflicted. i had to sit so my back didnt touch any furniture. when company left She let me know that the punishment wasnt over and She had plans. She brought out out the restraints i hate because they dont allow me any leeway to move when i am in them. She told me She is going to teach me to not be a smartass to Her. She again pinched and twisted my breast really hard and refused to let go for awhile. She also told me that a new rule is when i ask if the punishment is over-i will be punished for asking. She is watching a program on her laptop and She gave me permission to get on mine. i am on pins and needles wondering when my punishment will commence. i know its going to hurt like hell and not a good hurt. i can still feel the welts on my back and my breasts and nipples are all bruised up. i havent had the oppurtunity to see if the anal toys have been moved. She knows i hate Her to use them on me without lube. it is not a hard limit-just something i dont enjoy. i wish i could figure out what possesses me sometimes to be a smartass and disrespect Mistress.

puppy's rules

I decided to just blog my rules for now. I will link them later if the need arises.

puppy's rules:

i submit to my Mistress . i desire to serve and please Her by doing so.

if i displease my Mistress She will tell me and explain how i displeased her & give me punishment at her discretion.

i will always show respect for my Mistress.

i am allowed access to my laptop & the internet. i am allowed to have contact with any other submissives but not any other dom/me's unless given specific permission by Mistress.

i am allowed to remain in contact with my family, friends,etc.. If i am to go visit any of them i am to tell Mistress with proper notice so my other duties can be rearranged if need be.

When not with my Mistress i am allowed to make independent decisions with her rules in mind. if i am unsure i will contact Mistress immediately for her final decision.

when we are alone i will always address my Mistress as "Mistress". When we are around children, in public or around vanilla family/friends i will address her with an affectionate term or her name.

i am permitted to watch the television or DVDs with my Mistress.

my money is mine to keep and after helping to pay bills, i can buy what i want unless it is a major purchase, then i am to have Mistress's input.

it is my responsibility to discuss anything that may become an issue with Mistress. i am responsible for my words,feelings and actions.

it is my duty to make sure Mistress always has a cool bottled beverage next to her.

it is my duty to take off Mistress's shoes & socks at night.

it is my duty to clip her toenails when the need arises.

i am not to diddle dawdle or procastinate

i am responsible for the housework, laundry & majority of the cooking. Mistress will decide when she desires to cook and will inform me so i know not to prep anything else for dinner. Mistress will take care of any of the handywork around the house & i am responsible to help her when needed.

i am to prioritize my daily activities under the following triage. children/grandchildren first then our pets needs then kitchen and bathrooms then rest of the chores.

dinner is at 6pm. all of my other chores will be done by the time it is to make dinner.

laundry is to be done on saturdays.

i am to sleep totally nude and in a way that does not inhibit Mistress's access to me. i am allowed to wear appropriate pajamas in the winter to keep me warm.

i am not to disturb Mistress when she is sleeping unless vital emergency.

when i am on my cycle i am to inform Mistress so she knows that part of me is not accessible at that time.

i will make eye contact with my Mistress when speaking or when my Mistress speaks to me.

i am to always sit or lay down near Mistress or be within calling range. when walking down the street i am to walk on the insided path away from the curb with Mistress on the outside.

my entire sexual being now belongs to my Mistress.

i must never reach orgasm without explicit permission from my Mistress.

i must never touch my erotic parts in a sexual way without permission from my Mistress.

i can use my safewords during a scene but not during punishment.

at home i am to keep the bathroom door open when i am in there.

i am to keep my underarms, legs and pussy shaved.

i am to shower at least once a day (i shower at least 2x a day :) ) i am to wash my hair every other day or when needed during the heat. i am to use only the soaps and shampoo/conditioners that Mistress has helped me to pick out.

i am to wait outside the bathroom door when Mistress is showering & wait for her to call me so i can wash her back.