i am soo lucky...

to have such a wonderful,loving and understanding wife and Mistress.

my back is better but not all healed. Mistress has added a few more duties that i can do that won't compromise my back.

early this morning She sensed that i needed pain. i was servicing Her feet and She had me lay all the way down on the floor. i love kneeling and laying at Her feet. i would do it everywhere and all the time but that isnt practical. anyhooo....when i was laying down She proceeded to step hard onto my tits and nipples. i wasnt allowed to move or make a sound. the pain felt soo good and my pussy was getting wet. Mistress saw that i was turned on and told me i will have to wait for toytime. She continued to press down with Her feet onto my tits until She knew that i had enough. i thought She was done but when i was in the kitchen starting to make Her breakfast...She came over and proceeded to pull and twist my nipples. She then popped me in the ass and told me what She wanted for breakfast. i am now all twittipated and She told me we are going out today. i am not sure what She has in mind. i think it will be fun as i havent done anything out of line lately.

an aching back and aching for play

i went to the doctors and found out i severely strained the muscles in my lower back. Mistress has put me on light duty. i appreciate it but it also bugs the hell out of me that i am unable to do all of my duties. i am on a muscle relaxant and pain reliever and my back is feeling better. i am only taking the meds at night now...i hate feeling doped up during the day.

we are now in another state living in a huge house. the house owner is an old friend of mine who lives in the garage that was made into an apartment. we had to put our calico cat down. we found out she had cancer that had spread everywhere. we miss her but know she is at peace and out of pain. we now have a boxer/bulldog mix that my friend found. he is a moose and a character. he has taken a liking to Mistress.

with all of the packing and moving...Mistress and i havent had alot of private time. instead of a few hours at a time...we have moments that Mistress will torture my tits or spank my ass. She made a home-made flogger out of 1/4 inch rope that She put knots in at the end. She introduced me to it by smacking me with it really hard out of the blue. it scared the shit out of me-i thought something had bit me. Mistress giggled and promised that if i didnt behave i would be getting more of it. the next day is when my back went out. i was bending over to move a backpack off of a box i wanted to bring into the house...i felt a sharp pain in my back that went down into my legs. i fell over and laid there trying to get the pain under enough control that i could stand up. Mistress heard me cry out and came over and asked what was wrong. i told Her and She giggled at the sight of me trying to get up into the chair. i still went through things...i was determined to work through the pain. the next day when She saw that i was having problems just trying to sit on the toilet...She told me to go to the doctor. She said if i didnt go She would take my mind off of my back pain by making something else on my body hurt alot worse.

today i am doing laundry and moving the things in our room around to move the bed. its by a window which is putting a cold draft onto Mistress. my friend noticed that i do alot of the housework and inquired on why my wife doesnt do some of it. i told her that is between my wife and i and that is what i want to do. i may explain to her later Mistress's and my dynamic but at this time i am not really in the mood to explain it.

i hope that Mistress and i have more private time soon. She needs it and so do i.

those 5 words...

"I am proud of you" from Mistress mean the world to me.

i have been walking on clouds since last night...i am a very happy slave that i have made Mistress sooo happy with me...here is what happened....

with Mistress and i both in school during the day and Her teen sitting at night~we haven't had alot of time together. however Mistress found a way to reward me for my patience. She gave me a looong list of errands to do and a time limit to do them in. when i was done i was to meet Her at a certain time with our youngest so i could do the shopping for the teens She is watching. i did everything without complaint. when we were done we went outside to wait for the bus~we just missed it so we had to wait in the cold. the kids sat down to listen to music at an ipod. Mistress and i walked a half a block away to smoke. i was shivering from the cold~i had on a thick coat and everything but the wind was chilling me to the bone. Mistress shielded me from the cold and told me She was proud that i had done everything with a great attitude. i smiled from ear to ear. She walked me just around the corner of a structure and looked to make sure no one was looking. She grabbed onto my tit and twisted it just hard enough and long enough to get me warm. i loved it :)!!! we had to get back to the kids so we walked back to wait for the bus. the kids werent paying alot of attention to us (go figure) and every time i started to shiver Mistress would pinch me somewhere to get me warm again.

we finally made it back to the teens's house. i made it home later and called Mistress to let Her know i made it home ok. She told me once again how proud She is of me and i did a really good job. She was reading my mind and answered what i was thinking. She said i am not getting toytime until She is home nights again. She wants to be here to watch (and probably make me beg to cum knowing Her *snicker*). i am thinking on asking Mistress if i can buy some rubber sheets. it's been almost 2 months since She has allowed me to cum. the last time i was on restriction this long-i soaked a mattress when i squirted and we had to buy another one. Mistress hopes to be home by the end of the month...so if around that time you hear of a typhoon coming from my area...run for cover (unless squirt juice is your kink *wink*)

finally...

i don't have classed today and the kids are at school...so i finally have the peace and time to update on the playtimes Mistress and i have had.

i can't remember exactly what day it was but the children were gone and i thought Mistress was napping. i went to lay down next to Her to read a book and was pleasantly surprised when She rolled over and punched me hard with that twinkle in Her eye. just that one punch sent my clit abuzzing and my nipples got hard. Mistress started pinching and twisting my nipples and breasts. i began quivering and moaned "oooh yes". Mistress does this thing of grabbing my nipples and twisting them as far as they will go and then rubbing them between Her fingers. the pain is excruciating and i love it. the more She tortured my tits the wetter my pussy was becoming. my pussy was begging for stimulation. Mistress gave me Her sadistic smile and kicked me full force in the clit. i almost came right then~i asked Mistress if i could cum and She said no. She then pushed Her foot hard into my pussy and started rubbing my clit really hard. She was still torturing my tits and told me to not cum. She kept rubbing and torturing until i felt like my head was going to shoot off of my body. She then rolled me over and spanked me hard on my ass. my ass felt like it was on fire which made my pussy drool and quiver even more. i felt myself start to drift away onto the clouds but Mistress grabbed me by the hair and slapped my face a couple times. She gave me a look and i knew that i am not to go into subspace until She wants me to. She picked up an unused flyswatter and proceeded to swat me all over my tits,ass and pussy. i was all tingly, in pain and again felt myself turning into goo. Mistress put down the flyswatter and again started to torture my tits and rubbing Her foot into my pussy. my body was begging to cum...for release...but Mistress refused. i was in the clouds and Mistress decided that i had had enough. She had me drink some vitamin water and laid me down next to Her. She covered us both up while spooning me and we both had a very restful nap in each others arms.

i am still on orgasm restriction. Mistress is training me to deepen my submission to Her. She told me i am to work on not engaging my mouth before my brain. She doesnt care if i havent had coffee or need a cigarette...i am to automatically be Her slave even when i am sleeping. if i can stay smartass free until this weekend then She will allow me to cum. it is going to be hard for me as i dont even know my name before my morning cup of coffee and cigarette. i am determined to do it though. i want to be the slave that Mistress deserves.

sniffle....

what i have been fearing has happened...i have a bad cold virus and there is nothing i can do about it. i woke up this morning coughing, sore throat and bad congestion. even though i am feeling under the weather i am feeling better than i have in awhile.

Mistress and i had quality time last night. i didnt even know She had planned it until i was sitting here on another website and She laid into me out of nowhere. She grabbed my nipple and pulled really hard while twisting. i barely had time to recover when She grabbed ahold of my neck and clamped down on it. She kept up the tit torture while squeezing my neck harder. the pain in my nipple was getting my pussy wet with excitement. i didnt have any air to breathe so i did the tap out signal so Mistress knew to let go so i could breathe. She let me take a breath and clamped down again. She did this a few times and then signaled for me to get my ass into our room.

i got up and went to the bedroom. Mistress started in with the tit torture again. the pain was yummy and my clit was buzzing and aching to be touched. Mistress sensed my excitement and gave me a kick right into my pussy. i almost came from the pain. She kept kicking me and turned around to heel kick my pussy. after one kick instead of putting Her foot down, She kept it right on my clit and rubbed it. it felt so good that i started moaning with pleasure. i was on the verge of having an orgasm when She pulled Her foot away. She continued punishing my nipples while my juices ran down my inner thighs. She turned me around and started scratching my ass and thighs. She dug Her nails into my ass and put Her ear by my mouth so She could hear me whimper in pain & pleasure. i needed to cum with a vengeance but She refused to give me permission. i went to sleep afterwards and slept good all night. then i woke up and felt like i was under attack by ninja germs. can a slave get sick from orgasm denial???

i still have an ache to cum but i will wait for Mistress's permission. we don't play while one of us is sick to avoid passing germs back and forth.

vibrations!!!

thursday while running errands Mistress surprised me by having us go into an adult toy store. She said She was getting us something to celebrate the day in november a few years ago that we began dating. after looking around She decided on getting a wireless remote vibrating egg. i was thrilled and couldnt wait to try it out. after we got home Mistress put the batteries in and had me put it in. it felt really nice :) the remote allows Her to not only control the strength but also the type of vibrations. it was right against my g-spot and Mistress enjoyed seeing me in pleasure. however when i felt the wave of orgasm start-Mistress would turn it down. She had it turned all the way up a few times and i could feel the vibrations up into my skull. She told me to keep it in but She was going to give the batteries a rest. we began reading and everytime i was really into my book She would hit the remote to make me squirm and/or jump. my book almost went flying into the wall a few times. Mistress still refused to allow me to cum. as it got closer to our bedtime i asked Mistress if i could take it out and She said no. i kept it in and went to sleep. next thing i know i am being jarred awake by my pussy vibrating. Mistress is a light sleeper and everytime Her eyes opened She would hit the remote. once i jumped so far i bumped my head on the wall. needless to say i did not get that much sleep. Mistress was having aloooot of fun making me jump. next She wants me to wear it in public...i am mixed with anticipation and eagerness. i love how it feels. however it is going to be difficult for me to not let on what is going on. Mistress also informed me that soon we are going to begin on ass training. not for my pleasure -but for the humiliation of punishment.

we did try out the tens unit. Mistress put it on my flesh-the setting She had it on was too strong. Mistress has been trying to figure out why the settings are off. She is going to have it checked out before She tries it on my pussy. i am still on razor/veet restriction and i am worried about burning my pubes off. i do miss being bare but would rather look like chewbacca then to have my pussy burnt. Mistress loves that i am humiliated to be hairy.

Mistress also had fun putting green & red clothes clips on me. She had them all over my tits. She took Her time putting them on and had fun making different designs. i loved the pain. i dont know what it is but tit pain gives me micro-orgasms. all Mistress has to say is "give me your tits now" and my pussy gets all wet. She also bought a spatula with holes in it from the dollar store and used that on my ass & tits. it made pretty marks and bruises. the dollar store is a delight for the sadist in Mistress....also for the masochist in me.

my laptop croaked so now we are down to just the desktop until the laptop is fixed. i can't wait. this desktop is an antique. that is why this post is short. i want to get it posted before this damn thing freezes up. i will elaborate more on things when we get the laptop back.

everyone take care, stay warm and safe :)

beating me out of the blues

Mistress and i had some quality time today-She made sure of it. i had been feeling blue, out of it and found it hard to focus. it had been awhile since Mistress had inflicted delicious pain on me and i was needing it.Mistress had also been on edge as She hadnt been able to let off any steam by the same token.

we had our place to ourselves this afternoon-so Mistress gave me the look that it was time for me to get my beating. Mistress started out with punishing my ass by kicking it hard. Mistress knows i prefer my ass to be whipped but She will kick to make the pain more intense. She generally starts out slow but not today.i saw the look on Her face and knew She needed to beat me more than i needed Her to beat me. with the first kick i knew the pain was going to be intense. i was loving every minute of it. at first my ass was warm but then it grew hot. a few kicks caught me in the pussy by mistake. i gasped in surprise but then relished the pain that was making my juices start to flow. my ass was fire hot and i knew that there was going to be alot of bruises for awhile. i felt the endorphins start to kick in and was feeling all glowy.


Mistress then turned me around and pulled on my growing pubes. i thought maybe She had decided to just pull them all out to make my pussy bald again. a part of me was hoping not and a part of me was hoping She would. She let go and then proceeded to punch at my thighs. my ass was on fire and now my legs were being pummeled. the pain was almost unbearable but it was decadent.


Mistress then started on what i think is Her favorite-breast & nipple torture. i love it too. Mistress grabbed my left breast and twisted it hard while squeezing it. She does this thing where She will take a pinch of breast (or nipple) and put it between Her thumb and forefinger and tweak it really hard while squeezing as hard as She can. it feels like She is ripping a piece of flesh out of my breast (or nipple). that scares me which makes the pain more intense and heightens my enjoyment. Mistress let go of my boob and then grabbed at the nipple-first teasing it to make it rock hard and then pulling it while twisting it.


my vision started getting blurry and i was unaware of some of the things Mistress was doing to me. Mistress knew i was in subspace so She stopped and after we showered-we sat on our couch playing our favorite online games and watching some tv programs we like to watch. i thanked Mistress for my beating and She gave me a wierd smile. i asked Her "what?" and She didnt answer. i found out after a bit what She was smiling about. one thing She has been training me on is to not make a sound while i am being punished or disciplined. i guess a friend of mine had called when i was busy this morning and told Mistress she would call back at a specific time. Mistress didnt tell me but made sure i was home at that time.


my friend called when she said she would and so i began chatting with her and filling her in on what i have been up to. this friend of mine is very vanilla and doesnt know the full extent of Mistress's and my dynamic. Mistress knows this and so She knew this would be the perfect time to do what She had been training me to do. Mistress moved over closer to me on the couch when i was on the phone and laid Her hand across me and into my lap. i thought nothing of it and continued talking. next thing i knew-BAM-Mistress smacked Her hand into my breast and had a handful of it. She was squeezing it really hard and twisting it. i looked at Her and She mouthed to me to not make a sound and to talk to my friend. i did as i was told. Mistress let go and i thought She was done, but nope, She grabbed another handful and was twisting it all over the place. She did this several times and i did really good at not making any noise but talking to my friend. Mistress then grabbed again and dug Her nails into my nipple. i let out a "oooouuuccchhhiiieee mama". my friend asked "what?" and i told her the cat just scratched me. Mistress let out a chuckle and let go. just then a program was starting that Mistress and i love so i told my friend i had to let her go. Mistress and i watched our program and Mistress went to bed early because we have to leave before the crack of dawn to go out of town on business.


i am feeling alot better. my ass, thighs and tits are all bruised and marked. i love it when Mistress leaves marks on me. to me they are a token of my submissiveness to Mistress and a token of Her dominance to me. Mistress and i have been talking about the different titles in bdsm. i am Her submissive wife, Her property and Her slave as She has final say in everything. i only have say when She permits it. i do have equal say in our children and grandchildren because Mistress permits it. Mistress does not micromanage me and She loves that i am fiesty. i am only submissive to Her. i am respectful of other people but also independent and an alpha female. Mistress is one of but a few that have been able to quash the alpha in me-to top me and take my submissiveness from me. when i met Mistress i sensed in Her my dominant soulmate and She sensed in me Her submissive soulmate :)

i love you Mistress

???detachable nipples???

nice title-huh-well let me explain.

last monday night Mistress was doing more breast and nipple torture on me. She had punched, slapped and squeezed my tits all bruisy. it felt delicious and it made my pussy wet. to make me even wetter She started to squeeze and pinch my nipples. i had closed my eyes as She squeezed harder and harder. i felt the world start to melt away and was vaguely aware of my surroundings. Mistress tugged on a nipple which indicated to me to open my eyes. i looked down to see Her pulling to stretch out my right nipple and to twist it (like someone would twist a washcloth to wring out excess water). She twisted it as far as it would go. the pain was unbearable and i felt myself ready to cum. before i could ask for permission She started to pinch it really hard. i saw stars in my mind and felt my body turning to jelly. my pussy was quivering and the juices were running down my thighs. Mistress then twisted it harder while pinching it harder and my eyes almost popped out of my head. She realized i was in subspace and at my limit so She let go. i dropped onto my back on my side of the bed. apparently one of my knuckles lightly thumped the wall-however when i heard the sound the first thought that popped into my head was "did my nipple fall off"~trouble was...i said it out loud. Mistress started cracking up~She laughed so hard that tears were coming out of Her eyes. i didnt realize i had said it out loud~when i am in subspace my v-chip is disabled and i am unaware of what i say. She said She wished She had it on video so She could send it to an american funniest home porn show with the title "detachable nipples". She said i had the cutest serious face when i said it. its been almost a week and She is still walking by me and grabbing a pinch of nipple while walking away and saying "i need your nipple for awhile". will i ever live this down? has anyone else had an embarrassing moment during a scene?

Mistress also helped me break down and release alot of stuff this week. alot of things have been going on and i am the type that will deny how much it bothers me and keep busy doings things to avoid whats bothering me. alot of anger was building up and Mistress could sense it. She started to nitpick about things. She would ask me to do something and while i was doing it, She would ask me to do something else. then while doing the latter thing She would want to know why i wasnt doing the former. then when i would be trying to sleep She would knock on my forehead to wake me up. She also started to with-hold affection which She knows hurts my feelings and i get angry when my feelings are hurt. She kept this up for a few days-just mindfucking me. Mistress knows me better than i know myself and can get me to react just the way She wants me to. i finally reached my breaking point and became uber-bitch. She calls it "worse than a fighting pit bull mode" when i get that way. i got disrespectful and instead of ignoring me like She usually does-She got right in my face and scared me. i was backed into the cupboard and i asked Her to back up. She refused and kept telling me how pissed off She was. i got even more scared and then it happened-the dam broke and i just started crying. Mistress backed up and let me have my space. i cried hard for a few hours and felt alot better. i talked to Her about the things i had pented up. i know She would never abuse me. She just wanted to scare me to kick in my fight or flight response. i had no place to fly and i will never hit Mistress. She knew i would get scared which would help me move pass the anger and let things out.

now that that i feel better inside- i have the bug that is going around. i am sleeping on the couch-not as punishment but so Mistress wont get sick to just pass it back to me. She checks on me during the night and makes sure i push liquids and get alot of rest. wow-this thing turned into a book. well...the cough med is kicking in so i will bid y'all a good night :)

tit torture & other training

with U/us now having more alone time~Mistress has decided to put me through more training. one afternoon i was restricted to the bathroom. She had me take my clothes off. She then handed me the egg and told me to go into O/our bathroom and apply it to my clit until She said to stop. She also said i could cum when & how many times i wanted to-i just had to not make a sound while doing it. i also had to sit on the closed toilet seat and not fall off or move it in any way. O/our toilet seat pops off if there is a draft so i knew i wouldnt be able to move a hair. i went into the bathroom and sat, turned on the egg and put it to my clit. it felt really good but i wasnt able to really get into it because i was being careful to not make a sound or move. i started to feel myself cum so i braced my feet to the floor so i wouldnt move. i also put my free hand over my mouth so i wouldnt make a sound. i came and peaked out the door to Mistress to see if i was finished. She motioned for me to shut the door which meant i wasnt. i came 5 more times and with each one it grew harder and harder to not move or make a sound. Mistress was pleased with me and allowed me to play my favorite computer games :) thank you Mistress.

a couple days after that W/we were going through storage boxes and Mistress found an old motor for a battery charger. She got this evil grin on Her face and told me to bring Her the egg.

i brought it to Her and She had me sit down to watch Her splice the wires to the egg to the motor. She then handed it to me and told me to go try it out in the bathroom. i didnt have to stay in there. She just wanted me to put it on my clit, turn it on and come report to Her how it felt. i went into the bathroom,pulled off my pants & panties and turned the egg on. it vibrated my whole hand. i knew not to hesitate in doing as i was told so i put it up to my clit. my clit went "schwing" and my mind went "holy shit". i took it off, turned it off and put my pants and panties back on. i went back to Mistress and told Her how it felt. She smiled and had me put it back up.

W/we continued going through things and Mistress found a set of medical clamps. where She got them-i haven't a clue-but there they were. She came over and sat next to me. She grabbed my right breast and put the clamp on there. the pain was delicious. She twisted the clamp clockwise and counterclockwise and i felt my pussy getting wet. She unclamped it and reclamped it on another part of that tit. She repeated twisting it back & forth and i moaned in pleasure. She then grabbed at my nipple and tweaked it to make it hard. She took the clamp and clamped it to my nipple. the pain was almost unbearable. She then grabbed a rubber band and applied it to the clamp handle so She didnt have to keep Her hand on it. She told me not to move and kept it there for awhile. it was an intense mix of pleasure and pain. it was one of those "hurt so good" moments. She undid the rubber band and unclamped the clamp real fast. the pain always hurts worse on my tits when things are taken off than when they are put on. She then started tweaking the left nipple and put the clamp on. She didnt apply the rubberband but repeated the twisting and pulled on the nipple some. i almost came from the pain but i didnt since Mistress didnt give me permission. She kept twisting & pulling and it felt like She was going to pull my nipple off. logically i know that would never happen but it felt like it. when She took the clamp off my nipple looked mutated. i had marks all over my right breast with that nipple bruised and my left nipple was also bruised. Mistress had me lay down on my stomach to keep the nerves stimulated and hurting. She asked if i was wet and i said yes. after the pain subsided She let me sit up.

She asked if they still hurt and i said yes. She said she could take my mind off of my tits and proceeded to snap the bottoms of my feet with the rubberband. it was stinging like hell but i enjoyed it and it definitely took my mind off of my tits.Mistress then told me to get something off of the floor by the bottom of O/our bed. i laid down to get it and immediately felt a "swack" on my ass. i looked at Mistress and She had a hairbrush in Her hand that She was spanking me with. She spanked me a few times with the flat side. She then looked at the brush, turned it over and spanked me with the bristles side. the bristles made my ass sting. Mistress was spanking me in the same spot over & over. i looked at Her and told Her it was getting numb. She didnt like how i said it and got really angry with me. She said that making it numb was what She was going for and She didnt like me complaining about it. i tried to explain to Her that i was just trying to inform Her and wasnt complaining. She didnt want to hear it and told me the discussion was over. She told me W/we will talk about it again when She decides to-which is ok with me. She is the one in charge. i shouldve not have opened my mouth and let Her do what She was doing. i shouldve of waited for Her to ask me for my input. i know i am in trouble and Mistress is displeased with me. i am soo sorry Mistress :( i wasnt allowed to sleep in bed with Her that night after i was banished to the back porch for awhile. She was ignoring me for a couple days but now She is talking to me more. She knows that i hate being ignored-i would rather be whipped harshly. i have learned my lesson and still submitting to Her.

Has anyone else had their dom ignore them as punishment?