cats are driving this puppy insane....

we are moving tomorrow. everything is packed and we have the reinforcements lined up to get us out of here pronto. we are moving out to the country. the place is a bit smaller but has a bigger yard and a big huge storage unit for our camping gear. there is also a horse ranch across the way. Mistress said we are going to look into horse riding lessons our youngest. there is also a playground and a big field for our youngest to practice soccer in.

i am feeling a bit relieved to be out of here. the animals have been on edge. the cats think the stacks of boxes are for only their amusement. the tabby is lil miss evil knievel in that she will get on top of one stack and jump onto a stack across the room. most of the time she makes it...i almost have cardiac arrest when she crashes to the floor. i dont know if its because of her youth, that she gets bored easily or that she is in heat. she has it bad-she has even tried to mate with Mistress's steel toe boots.

i was touched today when Mistress and i were going through things and i came across some old letters i had written Her ages ago. i never knew She had them. come to find out She always carries them in Her leather jacket by Her heart but had taken them out when we took it into be professionally cleaned. Her and i have been running on fumes and have been a bit testy at times with each other. i have been doing most of the packing and Mistress showed Her appreciation this afternoon before the kids got home from school. She pinned me to the bed and proceeded to flog my tits. She forbid me from cumming. She had to leave and said we would finish later. She told me once we are moved and settled~we are going to have a few days kid free to do as She wishes.

well...need to get back to the last minute packing.

STRESSED!!!

we came home yesterday to find a termination of tenancy notice on the door. we are the 3rd gay couple to be evicted. we have been planning on moving anyhow~this place is falling apart. the owners know about it~they even took pics of it~and havent fixed it yet. there are other problems they havent fixed. Mistress told me to pack everything up which i am doing and we are finding a place today. it may take a bit to get internet into the new place~but i will be back to posting when we are reconnected.

Martin Luther King Day

the kids are home today so we are having a family day. the youngest was talking to me about reading on martin luther king in school. she mentioned that she didnt understand prejudice. i went to explain it to her but she said "mommy,i know what it is i just dont understand how people can hate like that. why cant people love with their hearts and not hate with their stupidity".

out of the mouth of babes :)

the name meme

Mistress is gone all day today and said to catch up on reading blogs. i came across this one on kaya's blog and thought it would be fun to do.











ROCK STAR NAME: (first pet, current car): pup-pup dakota
GANGSTA NAME: (favorite ice cream flavor, favorite kind of shoe): cookie-dough reebok
HIPPY NAME: (what you ate for breakfast, favorite tree): toast maple
SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, city where you were born): anne seattle
STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 of your first name): low te
SUPERHERO NAME: (favorite color, favorite drink): blue diet pepsi
NASCAR NAME: (the first names of your grandfathers/grandmothers): lester laura
STRIPPER NAME: (the name of your favorite perfume/cologne/scent, favorite candy): princess truffle
TV WEATHER ANCHOR NAME: (Your 4th grade teacher’s last name, a city that starts with the same letter): crow covington
SPY NAME: (your favorite season/holiday, flower): spring lily
CARTOON NAME: (favorite fruit, article of clothing you’re wearing right now): strawberry jammies

sasquatch sighting

this morning i woke up and went into the bathroom~i caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and........ omg!!!

i am a sasquatch slave.

Mistress doesn't seem to mind the hair~in fact She has been having Her sadistic fun by pulling on my pussy hair at random times >:)

those 5 words...

"I am proud of you" from Mistress mean the world to me.

i have been walking on clouds since last night...i am a very happy slave that i have made Mistress sooo happy with me...here is what happened....

with Mistress and i both in school during the day and Her teen sitting at night~we haven't had alot of time together. however Mistress found a way to reward me for my patience. She gave me a looong list of errands to do and a time limit to do them in. when i was done i was to meet Her at a certain time with our youngest so i could do the shopping for the teens She is watching. i did everything without complaint. when we were done we went outside to wait for the bus~we just missed it so we had to wait in the cold. the kids sat down to listen to music at an ipod. Mistress and i walked a half a block away to smoke. i was shivering from the cold~i had on a thick coat and everything but the wind was chilling me to the bone. Mistress shielded me from the cold and told me She was proud that i had done everything with a great attitude. i smiled from ear to ear. She walked me just around the corner of a structure and looked to make sure no one was looking. She grabbed onto my tit and twisted it just hard enough and long enough to get me warm. i loved it :)!!! we had to get back to the kids so we walked back to wait for the bus. the kids werent paying alot of attention to us (go figure) and every time i started to shiver Mistress would pinch me somewhere to get me warm again.

we finally made it back to the teens's house. i made it home later and called Mistress to let Her know i made it home ok. She told me once again how proud She is of me and i did a really good job. She was reading my mind and answered what i was thinking. She said i am not getting toytime until She is home nights again. She wants to be here to watch (and probably make me beg to cum knowing Her *snicker*). i am thinking on asking Mistress if i can buy some rubber sheets. it's been almost 2 months since She has allowed me to cum. the last time i was on restriction this long-i soaked a mattress when i squirted and we had to buy another one. Mistress hopes to be home by the end of the month...so if around that time you hear of a typhoon coming from my area...run for cover (unless squirt juice is your kink *wink*)

48 question meme

i found this on jflame's blog. Mistress has to be gone more to tend to things so i have been bored,bored,bored.


1.When you looked at yourself in the mirror today, what was the first thing you thought?
omg!!! what the hell is frankensteins' bride doing in my bathroom???
2.How much cash do you have on you?
about $3
3.Whats a word that rhymes with 'Door'?
more~as in i need more coffee-brb.


4.Favourite planet?
venus
5.Who is the 4Th person on the missed call list on your cell phone?
one of our adopted kids
6.What is you favourite ring tone on your phone?
the one Mistress and i have for each other.
7.What kind of top are you wearing?
nike t-shirt (one of Mistress's) that i sleep in.
8.Do you label yourself?
i am Mistress's slave
9.Bright or dark room?
dark (bright hurts eyes)
10.What do you think about the person who took this meme before you?
author of a blog i recently started reading
11.What does your watch look like?
don't wear one
12.What were you doing at midnight last night?
sleeping & probably also snoring.
13.What did your last text message say?
a private message from Mistress
14.Where is your nearest 7 - 11?
a city block away
15.Whats a word you say a lot (not yes or no)?
aside from Mistress~"piffle"( i am working on cutting down my profanity)
16.Who told you he/she loved you last?
Mistress
17.What was the last furry thing you touched?
the build a bear Mistress got for me.
18.How many drugs have you done in the past three days?
2~caffeine and nicotine
19.Favourite age you have been so far?
the age i am now-i have learned alot about myself this last year
20.Your worst enemy?
the cage Mistress puts me in when i have been bad.
21.What was the last thing you said to someone?
have a good day~i love you Mistress.
22.If you had to choose between a million bucks and the ability to fly, what would you choose?
a million bucks-i am terrified of flying
23.The last song you listened to?
some hannah montana song our youngest listens to at night
24.Whats your favourite number?
777-the date Mistress and i got married.
25.Where did you live in 1987?
in a brownstone with my gay best-friend and his partner.
26.What do you do when vending machines steal your money?
hit it with my purse
27.If you had to get a tattoo, what and where?
a rose with ribbon with my children's names in the ribbon. on my chest by my heart
28.If you could be fluent in any other language, what would it be?
sign language
29.Are you touchy feely?
depends on how well i know the person and if Mistress is ok with it.
30.Name three things that you have on you at all times?
wedding ring,glasses & hair tye
31.When was the last time you WROTE a letter to someone and mailed it?
ummmm-hard to remember. i think it was to Mistress's cousin
32.Can you change the oil on a car?
no-i am forbidden from touching anything mechanical at all.
33.How far back do you know about your ancestry?
a couple hundred years back into sicily and scotland.
34.When showering, do you start the water and then get in, or get in and then start the water?
start the water first.
35.Do you moan in the shower like the people on the Herbal Essences adverts?
depends on if Mistress is in there with me and She allows me to
36.Have you ever showered with someone of the opposite sex?
yes-ages ago.
37.Have you ever been forced to share the shower with one of your siblings?
with a couple of my sisters when we were camping.
38.How old do you look?
i still get carded for alcohol.
38.How old do you act?
depends on my mood and Mistress's expectations
39.What was the last song you sang?
"life's what you make it" by hannah montana with our youngest.
40.Do you kiss with your eyes open or closed?
closed.
41.What is the sexist thing about Condoleeza Rice?
i honestly can't think of anything...ummm..she isnt my type.
42.Who's the sexist famous woman alive?
Mistress and i lust halle berry
43.Who's the sexist famous man alive?
ummmmm????....i am drawing a blank.
44.Does every family have a crazy uncle?
oh yes. my family doesnt call him crazy he is just "eccentric"
45.Does playing the guitar make a man/woman more attractive?
if the woman is also on a harley-hell yes!!!
46.Have you ever had sex in a tent or sleeping bag?
oh yes
47.What about in a boat?
yes
48.Should guys wear pink?
if it compliments them-yes

how spankable am i???

i came across this on another blog. wow-it definitely rings true.

Your result for The How Spankable Are You Test...

SPANK SLUT

You are 93% spankable!

You loved to be spanked, good and hard, with any available object. You will take it as hard as anyone is willing to give it. You are probably guilty of provoking your lover into spanking you, by flagrant misbehavior or verbal challenges. Hell, your ass is probably red right now. We wouldn’t be surprised if you are standing at the keyboard, because it hurts to sit down.

Take The How Spankable Are You Test at HelloQuizzy

cleaning & changes....

i am going to be cleaning & revamping my blog over the next couple of weeks. i am changing some of the music, maybe the layout and skimming down the bloglist. there are some blogs that have gone dormant that will be taken off to make room for blogs that are more active.

Mistress has also told me to simplify my life. with school and everything else going on-my insomnia is back. i have tried to be super-slave while also trying to be super-mom, super-grandma, and super-friend. Mistress and i talked about it. She was blunt in telling me that it is impossible for me to take care of everyone and everything all of the time. i am to do my duties and take care of Her and me. whatever other people(kids/grandkids/friends) can do for themselves-so be it. i was soo stressed about shit that it was toxic to me, my ability to be Mistress's slave and Hers and my marriage. She knows me soo well that She knew long ago what was going on with me...while i hadn't a clue. i asked Her why She didnt tell me. She said it was because i would've scoffed at the idea and i would've been even more adamant at running myself ragged. She allowed me to get far enough to the end of my rope to listen to Her. She knows me better than i know myself. i am stubborn in that i am always insisting on helping others while refusing help from others. Mistress has set the limit for me that i am to only to do my duties and what other things She tells me and then take time for myself each day. it will be different but i trust Mistress that this is what is best for me and our marriage. Her and i are forever so what matters most is what is the healthiest thing for us.

well...it's almost 3 in the morning and i need to try to get some more sleep to get up for school.

t.m.i. tuesday (two for tuesday)

here is the t.m.i tuesday from i got from luna's blog today and last tuesday.

Would you rather…’ edition

1. Would you rather be stranded on an island alone or with someone you dislike/don’t get along with?

i would rather be alone. i tend to want to be alone anyhow.

2. Would you rather accidentally walk in on your parents having sex or have them walk in on you?

in on my parents.

i have already walked into my parents having sex...it was embarassing but i imagine not as much as it would be if they walked in on Mistress and i.

3. Would you rather be snapped by paparazzi during a nipple slip or while exiting a car with out any underwear?(guys, consider similar circumstances)

nipple slip. the twins tend to pop out on occasion anyhow so it wouldnt be really that big of a deal for me.

4. Would you rather not have sex for two years or not be able to use the Internet for two years?

not use the internet. i have been on orgasm restriction for almost 2 months now and i am about ready to spontaneously combust.

5. Would you rather find true love or 1 million dollars?

true love which i already have :)

Bonus (as in optional): If you had to choose *one* sexual position for the rest of your life, what would it be? Why?

69-i am a lesbian so thats a no-brainer.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

1. On a scale of 1-10, how satisfied are you with your sex life?
an 8.

2. If someone shoves you up against a wall while kissing you, your reaction is?
i get weak in the knees and horny as hell.

3. What is the most romantic thing anyone has ever done or said to you?
i was having a bad day last fall and Mistress picked up a fallen leaf and handed it to me while saying "feel better puppy" with the look of love She gives me. it made me feel soo warm and loved inside that i started crying. i took the leaf and Mistress kissed me and said "it's ok~i will never let anything ever happen to you baby". i still have the leaf tucked away in my memento box.

4. Where is the most unusual place you have ever had sex?
under the space needle during new year's eve festivities.

5. How do you liked to be kissed?

with a hand in my hair and me submitting to their desire. i dont like sloppy kisses but a kiss that conveys "you are mine".

worried...

this weekend has been a roller coaster. my doctor is weaning me off of some meds for my bipolar and anxiety to start me slowly on some other ones that have less side effects. needless to say i have been more emotional. Mistress calls it my "exorcist" mode. yesterday was our anniversary of when we became a couple. we went out to the same restaurant we did where we had "the talk" as we do every year on january 10th. Mistress didn't want to eat and i was upset and took it personal that She didnt want to celebrate our anniversary. i have a habit of jumping to conclusions. Mistress enlightened me that Her stomache hasnt been keeping down anything..at all. i knew She had been having some heartburn but i thought it was just the meds She is taking for Her migraines. i won't go into detail about what we talked about but i found out that Her health issues are more serious than what She had shared with me. now i am worried...Mistress told me not to but that is like asking a dog not to scratch at a flea.

i finished my meal and we came home and She let me know She is not happy with how i didnt give Her the benefit of the doubt. we got the "story of o" for us to read...Mistress is reading it first. tonight She is teen sitting and i am still on toytime restriction. i feel bad for my attitude the last couple of days. why Mistress didnt haul off and smack me to correct my attitude...i don't know. She told me to think about what i had done and what i can do to make sure it doesnt happen again. that is exactly what i am going to do...while trying not to show how worried i am about Mistress.

finally...

i don't have classed today and the kids are at school...so i finally have the peace and time to update on the playtimes Mistress and i have had.

i can't remember exactly what day it was but the children were gone and i thought Mistress was napping. i went to lay down next to Her to read a book and was pleasantly surprised when She rolled over and punched me hard with that twinkle in Her eye. just that one punch sent my clit abuzzing and my nipples got hard. Mistress started pinching and twisting my nipples and breasts. i began quivering and moaned "oooh yes". Mistress does this thing of grabbing my nipples and twisting them as far as they will go and then rubbing them between Her fingers. the pain is excruciating and i love it. the more She tortured my tits the wetter my pussy was becoming. my pussy was begging for stimulation. Mistress gave me Her sadistic smile and kicked me full force in the clit. i almost came right then~i asked Mistress if i could cum and She said no. She then pushed Her foot hard into my pussy and started rubbing my clit really hard. She was still torturing my tits and told me to not cum. She kept rubbing and torturing until i felt like my head was going to shoot off of my body. She then rolled me over and spanked me hard on my ass. my ass felt like it was on fire which made my pussy drool and quiver even more. i felt myself start to drift away onto the clouds but Mistress grabbed me by the hair and slapped my face a couple times. She gave me a look and i knew that i am not to go into subspace until She wants me to. She picked up an unused flyswatter and proceeded to swat me all over my tits,ass and pussy. i was all tingly, in pain and again felt myself turning into goo. Mistress put down the flyswatter and again started to torture my tits and rubbing Her foot into my pussy. my body was begging to cum...for release...but Mistress refused. i was in the clouds and Mistress decided that i had had enough. She had me drink some vitamin water and laid me down next to Her. She covered us both up while spooning me and we both had a very restful nap in each others arms.

i am still on orgasm restriction. Mistress is training me to deepen my submission to Her. She told me i am to work on not engaging my mouth before my brain. She doesnt care if i havent had coffee or need a cigarette...i am to automatically be Her slave even when i am sleeping. if i can stay smartass free until this weekend then She will allow me to cum. it is going to be hard for me as i dont even know my name before my morning cup of coffee and cigarette. i am determined to do it though. i want to be the slave that Mistress deserves.

sorry....

i have been so busy with the start of school and doing my duties for Mistress (Her back is out) that i completely forgot about doing my t.m.i. tuesday yesterday. i will make up for it by doing two of them next tuesday (a two for tuesday special :) )

i think Mistress threw Her back out when we were playing...but more about that later.

i gotta head out the door to get to school...hopefully i will be able to update y'all tomorrow on everything that has been happening.

some q&a of my year

it is snowing outside again~hopefully it will stop so there is school tomorrow. Mistress is teen sitting again. a friend of mine sent me this meme on a vanilla site and i thought i would post it here and elaborate where my being slave applies.

if you are reading this~feel free to use it on your blog. just leave me a note in a comment so i can check your answers out.

1. What did you do in 2008 that you’d never done before?

experienced breath play & tens unit with Mistress.i also cleaned out and carved a pumpkin~i know that may not seem like a big deal but the smell of pumpkin guts makes me very queasy.

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

for the most part i did and yes i have made a few for 2009.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

our daughter in-law had our grand-daughter :)

4. Did anyone close to you die?

my grand-father, a close friend and one of our iguanas :(

5. What countries did you visit?

none this year. need to get my passport for our summer trip to canada.

6. What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008?

more patience with myself and not being over-analytical about things. since Mistress is happy with me as Her slave then i need to relax and not worry about it.

7. What dates from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

may 26th~the birth of our grand-daughter

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

having a better handle on my panic attacks so i can go back to school. i also now make Mistress approved crepes for Her.

9. What was your biggest failure?

not quitting smoking entirely

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

just the normal colds & flu's i get every year. i got whiplash tripping over a cat and took a fall down the stairs thanks to my dog pulling too hard on the leash.

11. What was the best thing you bought?

a digital camera/video cam that i am filling up with pics/vids of everything.

12. Whose behaviour merited celebration?

our oldest daughter's~she has really matured in the last year.

13. Whose behaviour made you appalled and depressed?

ignorant family members who treat me as a pariah because i am gay.

14. Where did most of your money go?

bills,food and the kids/grandkids.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

signing up to go back to school and Mistress talking of collaring me this april.

16. Compared to this time last year, are you:a) happier or sadder? b) thinner or fatter? c) richer or poorer?

i am happier,thinner and poorer,

17. What do you wish you’d done more of?

camping out more with family and having more private moments with Mistress

18. What do you wish you’d done less of?

over-analyzing things

19. How did you spend Christmas?

spent it at home with Mistress and the children.

20. Did you fall in love in 2008?

yes~i fall in love with Mistress more and more everyday.

21. What was your favorite TV program?

i love lucy,absolutely fabulous,coupling, keeping up appearances, csi,bones, dexter and red green and red dwarf

22. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?

i really don't hate anyone.

23. What was the best book you read?

river running red by anne rule. she shared more information about the victims of the grk and didnt dwell on glr.

24. What did you want and get?

i wanted to deepen my submission to Mistress and She has given me patience and support.

25. What did you want and not get?

to get a house in the country~that fell through.

26. What was your favorite film of this year?

shutter

27. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

i had some private time with Mistress after She took me out to a romantic dinner and scary movie. i turned 38.

28. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

to be able to move out of this neighborhood.

29. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?

during the day i dress casually and at night i wear what is appropriate for what Mistress wants to do.

30. What kept you sane?

i do alot of reading and take alot of walks with Mistress. Mistress also buys me alot of things for the bath so i can relax in a hot bath of bubbles when everyone is out of the house :)

31. What political issue stirred you the most?

same-sex marriage legislation

32. Who did you miss?

my nana

33. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008.

don't sweat the small stuff

my resolutions...

i have been thinking alot on what i want to work on this year and have come up with the following:

my domestic service to Mistress~ my submissiveness has been off balance lately in that most of it has just been sexually. i want to do more for Mistress domestically. i keep the house up and do most of the cooking. i want to expand on my cooking and decorating. Mistress appreciates everything i do around the house already~i just want to do more because She deserves for me to be the best all around slave i can be. i have signed up on the flylady site and looking on the internet for different recipes Mistress will like that wont aggravate Her acid reflux.

my patience with myself~i am my hardest critic and want to work on that. if Mistress is happy then i need not fret about if i am lacking in my being Her slave. when i stress then Mistress stresses and thats not good for either one of us. what has been helping me lately is reading alot in the book "don't sweat the small stuff".

my smoking~i am down to half a pack a day at most. my smoking aggravates my asthma but when i dont smoke my anxiety goes up. it is a catch 22 and i am taking it one day at a time. i only smoke when i really, really need it and never smoke more than half a cigarette at a time.

my caffeine consumption~i was drinking at least 2 pots a day of really strong coffee (Mistress calls it mud). i want to cut down because caffeine can inhibit the body from absorbing calcium and i need all that i can get (osteoporosis runs rampant in my family on both sides)i am now down to a pot a day. the coffee helps with my asthma and the aches from my arthritis.

my education~i am going back to college next week so that is covered.

i wanted to work on my weight but Mistress told me that i look fine to Her. She likes me with some meat on my bones. i am a bbw blessed with big bosoms. i am still losing weight slowly from eating better and taking more walks. Mistress doesnt mind that some weight is coming off She doesnt want it coming off too fast or me stressing on the numbers.

that about covers it.

it is snowing again and Mistress and i have to go run errands~what joy!!!